Tag: Hope

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Let There Be Light…the End

Psalms 97:11
Light shines on the righteous and joy on the upright in heart.

So I began this journey talking about PTSD, anxiety, and depression. I then moved on to my seizures and two wonderful pups that were placed in my life. How do I connect all of this together? That is easy, God!

Only one of my seizure ever came back as epileptic. For many years, I was told my seizure activity was made up. The official term was pseudo-seizures. I had several doctors who truly made me feel like I was making it all up for attention. It wasn’t really their fault. Little was known about seizures at the time.

A few years ago, some new studies came out that linked pseudo-seizures with stress levels much in the same way they link migraines. As a matter of fact, I also suffer from migraines and my doctor said very often instead of coming out as a headache, sometimes my migraines were coming out as seizures.

These stressors can come in many different packages. I have environmental ones like certain foods I am allergic to as well as seasonal allergies. My body getting run down because of being sick or lack of sleep can become a trigger. Then there is the biggest one of all, life!

Annie was very good at noticing when I was getting stressed. She would often walk up to me and get me to pet her to take my mind off things. It was very calming and I can’t tell you how many seizures she helped me avoid by just calming me down. However, when those really difficult moments came and my PTSD kicked in I would get lost in the darkness. Even Annie struggled with how to bring me back.

I don’t know if it was because of the life he endured or if God just decided to equip him with a little extra light, but Meshach knows exactly what to do. Meshach runs to my side when he feels those anxieties creeping up inside me. When I am so frightened, reliving each and every moment of torment, he doesn’t let me walk alone. He cuddles me. He licks me. He simply stays right by my side and never takes his eyes off me. Just like when we first met.

God sends him to light the path for me. He is there to let me know I am not alone and we will get through this together. In the military, it is often referred to as “he’s got my six.” The really cool thing is I have his too. There are times when he leans into me when we are in a big crowd. I reach down, place my hand on his head and he looks up at me with those big brown eyes and I remind him, we are in this together. He lets out a slow breath, stands a little taller and we go on.

I don’t know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future. Right now God has chosen to show me his love and light through four big paws and a very wet nose.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

 

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Let There Be Light Part 3

Job 22:28
What you decide on will be done, and light will shine on your ways.

We met at a shelter.

When he escaped the man who was trying to put him back in his cage and came and sat in front of me, I knew we had a destiny. I heard several different variations of his back story.  None of them were very nice.  All of them ended with him being at the shelter nearly starved to death at only 4 months old.  He was now 7 months old, very sweet, but he was very timid and didn’t trust people.  As a matter of fact, everyone was just as shocked as I that he came up and just sat in front of me the way he did.

The nice young man came and got him, apologizing to me.  He gently pushed the puppy into his cage and shut the door.  I walked past and then back again.  It was like watching one of those paintings that seem to follow you everywhere.  He would not take his big brown eyes off of me.

My husband thought I was joking and tried walking by to see if he would look at him instead.  All the little pup did was turn his head to try and view around my husband to get another look at me. I was his world and the exact person he had been waiting for.

We got him back out and played with him for a while.  We even took him out to romp in the yard.  He took me to all his favorite spots, stopping every few steps to make sure I was following him.  He brought me various toys and responded with sits and waiting patiently as I looked over each gift.

I left him at the shelter that day because we had several other dogs to look at but I have to say I felt just like him.  With every dog we went to see, I would look around them to see the vision I still had of that cute little boy etched in my mind.

I spent the next morning going over the three dogs we had narrowed it down to.  I explained each one to my mom as we went for our daily walk.  I didn’t realize it at the time, but I really wasn’t giving her much detail about the other two.  As a matter of fact, I would make a comment about them and then say something to compare them to that cute little boy.

I remember my mom looking at me when I was done and saying, “I think you made up your mind and will be heading back to the shelter when we are done here.”  Did I ever tell you my mom is a very wise woman?

I took the paperwork and called my husband on the way to the shelter to let him know I was going to pick the puppy up.  When I got there everything fell into place like God himself had already laid out every step and was shining his light on the path.

What normally takes a couple of days to get approved, took me a couple of hours.  When they brought him out he sat across the room and smiled at me and wagged his tail in delight but he would not come to me at first.  I called him by his name they had given him but he stayed put.

Once again the Holy Spirit intervened with a loving but well-placed thump to my head.  He lovingly reminded me how we always said if we ever got a boy dog we would name him Meshach. So, I looked into his big brown eyes across the waiting room and smiled and said, “Hi, Meshach!”  He broke free from his handler and ran top speed right into my arms.

So about now I am guessing you are wondering about the seizures.  Well, if you remember I had been walking with my mom that morning and we had put in six miles.  I had not eaten much for breakfast and it was now nearly one in the afternoon.  Needless to say, my sugar levels were dropping.

I was sitting on the floor in a little room with Meshach while they finalized the paperwork.  He was entertaining himself by watching the kittens through the glass.  He stopped all of a sudden and walked over to me and put his paws on my shoulders and went nose to nose with me.  I started to shake all over and he just sat on top of me and started licking my face.  Once again God had equipped a dog with the power to know when my seizures were coming and how to best handle me.

What I didn’t know was God had equipped him with so much more!

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Come back tomorrow to read more of our story!
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Let There Be Light Part 2

Psalms 67: 1 & 2
May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face shine upon us, that your ways may be known on earth, your salvation among all nations.

This was not my first service dog. As a matter fact, my first answer to prayer had come eleven years before. Let me back up a little.

It was September of 2006. I had spent the last thirteen years going from doctor to doctor and trying a long list of medicines to control my seizures. Nothing was working and I had enough. I gave up all meds and decided to try a totally different avenue.

After lots of research and prayer, I chose to seek out the assistance of a service dog. My doctor at the time refused to sign off for me to get one from a company who trained seizure response dogs. As a matter of fact, he didn’t believe in them and told me he thought it was a bunch of “Hooey” and yes that was his professional opinion!

With the help of the company and lots of lessons from other sources, I learned how to train service dogs. So, we went on a search for the perfect dog. We called it operation Annie. My mother-in-law’s best friend had passed away and she was all about children and animals. I wanted to honor her memory.

My husband and I walked into a local shelter to just take a look. I remember I was on the phone with a friend walking around when my husband stopped in front of me. I heard him laughing. He had tried to walk by a cage and a cute little puppy reached out and grabbed him and wouldn’t let go.

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We escorted the little bundle of brown fur to a play area. She was all over my husband and would have nothing to do with me. I thought there was no way this dog was going to make a good service dog for me. However, my husband was in love and there was no telling him no.

So as he went to sign the papers and pay, I was left sitting in a little fenced in area. It was a showdown. We stared at each other. I hated the name they had given her. I sat there trying to decide what name we should give her. I swear I felt the Holy Spirit hit me upside the back of the head and say, “I don’t know what about Annie!” I felt like an idiot, but I looked at her and said, “Hi, Annie.” She leaped across the space between us and fell into my lap giving me the facial of all facials. That was just the beginning of many miracles yet to come.

Within the first week of owning this 6-week old chocolate lab/German pointer mix, she alerted to two seizures. Now let me explain something to you. You cannot train a dog to alert to a seizure. It is a rare thing for them to be able to pick up on them ahead of time. When you train a dog, you simply train them to respond once you start having one. This little thing dug her heels and would not walk another step, turned and jumped up on me before I had a seizure. I can only explain this with one word, God!

Over the next ten years, she served me well. She not only would give me a 15 to 30 minutes heads up, but she also learned how to make me start breathing again. It happened when she was quite small. She watched my mother push in on my diaphragm when I quit breathing during a seizure. The next time it happened she jumped on me trying to push in the same spot. When she realized it wasn’t working, she got frustrated and she bit me. It shocked me right out of it and I began to breathe again. Again, I can only sum this up as God!

Annie was a blessing to so many people. God truly shined his light through her everywhere she went.  She worked with kids with emotional issues as a therapy dog. She alerted to not only my seizures but also a student of mine’s, a substitute teacher’s I worked with and my son’s. She helped educate our community about service dogs and spent many hours in hospitals and nursing homes comforting people.

In 2015, Annie became very ill. When she finally bounced back she wasn’t the same dog. Her ‘get up and go’ was a little slower, her tail wagged a little less and she began to bump into things. Annie was going blind. We both knew it was time to find a replacement, but how was I ever going to replace her. The love of my life. The saver of my life many times over.

It would take lots of prayers, lots of dogs and seven months of searching. To paraphrase Bogart in Casablanca, “Of all the shelters in all the towns, in all the world, I walked into his.”

Come back tomorrow for more of my story.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Let There Be Light Part​ 1

Genesis 1:3
Let there be light. 

John 8:12
I am the light of the world.

How do you explain PTSD, anxiety, or depression to someone who has never been there?

How do you tell someone watching their loved one suffer that they cannot help or make it go away?  It isn’t their fault.  They did nothing wrong. Don’t take it personally. Their loved one is fighting their demons and they just got caught in the crossfire.

How do you tell someone if I could get out of bed, or off this couch, I would?  If I could quit crying, I would.  If I could stop flying off the handle, I would.  If I could. I would.

No. I didn’t choose to be this way today.  No. I haven’t gotten up on the wrong side of the bed.  No. I am not just feeling a little blue.  No. It isn’t just that time of the month. No. I am not angry at you.

How do I explain how I fee? I feel like I am trying to sweep a dirt floor in the middle of a hurricane.  I can hear everyone around me trying to explain it is a dirt floor.  I know the more I sweep the more dirt I will find.  I hear you scream out, “Why in the heck are you doing this?” while the wind whips around me depositing even more dirt.  But. I. Still. Sweep. And sweep.  And sweep.  I can’t stop.  The broom keeps moving and my hands are glued to it.  I can’t even look up to take a breath.  I. Must. Sweep.

There are no remedies to these problems.  There are no cure-alls.  There is just coping.  Getting through.  Today I would like to let you in on a few of my getting throughs.

Please let me start by explaining there are many medications that can help with the chemical imbalances that occur with PTSD, anxiety, and depression.  My body just doesn’t play well with any of them.  For those they work for, Praise God!  I am so excited for you. I have family and friends who find help in this area.

When I finally figured out meds were not for me, I reached out to others.  I prayed so hard for God to just take it all away. He chose to send me some help instead.  He put people in my life who understood.  People I could turn to in the darkness, who would hold my hand and walk with me. They became lights in my darkness.

I appreciate those people more than they will ever know or understand.  I know I can text and call them at the drop of a hat and they are there. But I didn’t want to always be dependent on them.  That is when God stepped in and said, “Let there be light!”

My light came in the form of four big paws and a very wet nose.  He, like me, ​had gone through some very unpleasant things in his life and was looking for just the right person to love him.

To learn more of my story come back tomorrow.
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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I am confident that I have no confidence! Or, do I?​

Judges 6: 12, 14 & 15

12When the angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon, he said, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.”

14The Lord turned to him and said, “Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand. Am I not sending you?”

15“Pardon me, my lord,” Gideon replied, “but how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family.”

I have confidence in sunshine,
I have confidence in rain.
I have confidence that spring will come again!
Besides what you see I have confidence in not me.

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For those of you Sound of Music fans who were singing along above, I apologize for the word change.  But I have to tell you confidence is not a close friend of mine.  I am so glad the bible is filled with not-so-confident characters to help me not feel alone.

One of my favorite Bible stories, when I was little, was about a man who had very little confidence.  As a matter of fact from the world’s point of view, he really didn’t have much to be confident of according to the bible.  This man described himself like this, “Look at me. My clan’s the weakest in Manasseh and I’m the runt of the litter.”

You can read the whole story in Judges chapters 6 through 8.  But for now, let me give you a little taste.

The Israelites had messed up yet again and turned back to doing evil in God’s sight.  So, he turned them over to Midianites who were very cruel to them.  They would march into their land and destroy everything. So the Israelites made hideouts in the caves of the surrounding mountains.   After being reduced to grinding poverty they finally cried out to God for help.

So, who does God send but Gideon the man of the weakest clan and the runt of the litter!  As a matter of fact, poor Gideon has such little confidence about anything he asked God for signs just to make sure he was hearing him correctly.

Oh, and to add insult to injury. Gideon was just finally finding a little confidence and sure that he was supposed to go out and defeat those guys who eat nuts and bolts and drank motor oil for breakfast. God gave him stepped up and gave him the next part of his plan.  Gideon my man you are getting an army of just 300 men to fight along side you!  Oh, and by the way, for your weapons of choice you will get a torch, jar, and trumpet.

Yes, you read that correctly!  God not only chose what the world deemed as a wimp, but he gave him just 300 men to go fight a huge army of elite fighting machines with just a torch, jar, and trumpet.  Now doesn’t that just scream confidence builder! Personally, I think I just would have screamed.

Insert Tabetha now.  I lack confidence in my abilities all the time.  I am not confident about being a wife and mother.  I am so not confident in my writing or teaching.  I am so not confident in standing up in front of people and speaking.  Let me let you in on a little secret.  Confidence does not mean lack of fear. Confidence means you go through with the plan in spite of the fear.

Much like Sister Maria, Gideon had lots of concerns, questions, and fears, but he marched on.  He took those three hundred men and defeated that army of ninjas, without lifting a sword

So you see it is OK to have questions, concerns and even fears because…

Strength doesn’t lie in numbers.
Strength doesn’t lie in wealth,
Strength lies in nights of peaceful slumbers,
When you wake up, wake up! 
It’s healthy!
All I trust I leave my heart to,
All I trust becomes my own!
I have confidence in confidence alone.
Besides, which you see, I have confidence in me! 
(I Have Confidence by Richard Rodgers)
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Yes, I would like a venti non-fat double shot strength peace-filled mocha latte, ​please.

Psalms 29:11 (NIV)

The Lord gives strength to his people, the Lord blesses his people with peace.

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Have you ever wished God was like Starbucks?  You know you walk up to the counter or drive up to the little speaker and you say,

“Yes, I would like a venti non-fat double shot strength peace-filled mocha latte please.”

I just want to see a menu of the fruits of the spirit and pray for a shot of this with extra that, all piled high with whip cream!

Yep, I so wish I could do that some days.  However, God seems to think I just need my daily portion and that will suffice.  I know.  He is right.  I also know there are many times he is standing there waiting to give me my portion and I don’t take it.  Or maybe you have been in a place where you have taken it but just not used it.

I am afraid it is time to sit down and have the hard talk now.  So, grab your cup of coffee, relax and take a deep breath.

Let’s start with the obvious.  We all know in our hearts, God is enough.  God gives us what we need when we need it.  I think we can all admit to having enough faith to believe that statement.  Our struggle, or at least my struggle is in the delivery.

I have always had faith God can do anything.  My faith starts being strained when you tie in the “will he” and “when will he” portions.

Over the years, I have really worked on both of these concepts.  It has been hard because there are so many times in our lives we pray for something and God doesn’t answer the way we want.  Now notice those last four words, “the way we want.”  All too often we go to God with a prayer and a plan. Then when God doesn’t follow the plan, we accuse him of not answering the prayer.  When in fact he is answering the prayer just with his plan.  Sometimes those plans include answers in the form of “no” and “not yet.”

Gulp. Breath. Ponder for a minute.

I can’t tell you why God is telling you no or to wait awhile.  I can only tell you he has your best interest at heart.  The situation you are going through today may be unimaginable.  I am thinking of a dear one who recently miscarried. Why would God put someone through all of that?  Why would his answer to bringing a new baby into a warm and loving family, be no or wait?  Why is the woman who can’t get pregnant at all hearing God say no or wait?  Why did that lady who never wanted a child and now wants an abortion to get pregnant in the first place?

I wish with every fiber of my being I could tell you why God does things.  But I can’t. I am not him.

I can tell you one thing though.  God is ALWAYS standing at the door waiting to give you his strength and blessing you with peace.  That is never a “no” or “wait” answer.  As a matter of fact, he is standing on his very tip toes, yelling out as loud as he can, “I am here! Just ask me!  I so want to give you strength and peace!  Ask me! Then take it and use it!”

Do you feel like you are in the pits today?  Do you feel the sorrow is so deep you don’t think you will ever get out?  Are you crying out for just a little of that strength and peace? I would love to pray for you.  You don’t have to tell me what you are going through.  You can leave a comment that just says pray, please.

In the mean time, may I leave you with this…

Lord, you have promised to give your people strength and to bless them with peace.  So, right now I am asking that you deliver on this promise and touch each of us with the strength and peace to carry on through our struggles today, tomorrow and forever to come.  I pray that we learn to cling to that strength and peace even on the days when it seems to take all of it just to take one more breath or one more step.  I will trust that it will be there again when I take the next ones and then again and again. I ask all of this in the name of Jesus. Amen


Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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That is so going on my blog!

1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NIV)

Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

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Do you know what the biggest hazard of being friends with a writer is?  You might end up in a blog.  I am constantly telling my friends (and family), “That is so going into a blog!”  Hey, I have been told good writers are good livers.  You want to be authentic, you write what you know.  What do I know?  I know I have enough material to keep you in stitches for the next year.  My friends and I do and say some pretty funny things.

I also know we have been through a lot together.  There have been so many tears and fears we could share: health scares, the death of loved ones, loss of finances, divorce, problems with kids, just to name a few.  My friends know if there is a lesson to learn in whatever we are going through, it could very well end up in a blog.

I wonder if anyone in the bible would have acted or talked in a different way if God had told them, “This is so going on my blog.” Is it wrong that I am thinking I hope not, just like I hope my friends don’t start acting differently because they are afraid they will end up on my blog?  I mean think of all the valuable lessons we could have missed out on.

    • Deceived Eve
 Genesis 3
    • Depressed Cain
 Genesis 4
    • Scheming Jacob
 Genesis 25
    • Weak Samson
 Judges 13-16
    • Fleshly Saul
 Acts 9
    • Self-Pitying David
 Psalms
    • Phony Judas
 Luke 22
    • Impulsive Peter
 Mathew 26

I truly wish I could take away some of the tears and fears my friends have lived through.  I have a lot of things that I have gone through I wish I could have passed on also. But God chose to lead us through those places and each and every one of these journeys has led us to where we are now.

I know for a time the pain is often almost unbearable.  I also know that no matter how much time passes we can still find ourselves grieving and hurting one day and at peace the next.  But what if those pieces of our history could help someone else not go through them or give them a little comfort and peace on their way through.

This is why it is really important to share our stories. We never know who may need to hear it.  Our ups, downs, ins, and outs could just save someone a little heartache and I know for me, that makes my heart ache a little less.
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Storm Alert!

Psalms 119:33&34

34 Give me understanding [a teachable heart and the ability to learn], that I may keep Your law; And observe it with all my heart.
35 Make me walk in the path of Your commandments,
For I delight in it.

Have you ever had to pray, “Lord, make me willing to be willing”?  I know for me there are some days that is all I have in me to give.  I am not in a place to even be willing to do the right thing.  No way! No how!  It is usually because I am so frustrated, angry or hurt at the moment that my inner rebellious little tantrum throwing child is screaming out in pure agony.

Just ask any of my children or my hubby and they will tell you I am very good at the hands on hips, foot tapping, laser eyes, and tightly drawn lips.  Shoot I even add the jaws clenched and teeth grinding some days.  It is in those moments I really need a heavenly attitude adjustment.

I know it.

Everyone around me knows it.

But I! Don’! Want! To! (Please insert stomping foot for full effect!)

I want to hand on to my anger and hurt.  I mean, it was obviously someone else’s fault that I am in this mess.  Somebody did something to me.  I would never choose to be acting like this; would I? Or would I?  Is that somebody really making me act this way?  Do they have so much control that they pull my strings and I perform?

Well, let me tell you, last time I checked Pinocchio and I could sing a duet.

I’ve got no strings
To hold me down
To make me fret, or make me frown
I had strings
But now I’m free
There are no strings on me

I am sorry to say, there is no one making you or I DO anything.

Now please pause with me here just one moment.  I am not saying we never have a reason to feel hurt or angry.  What I am saying is we can choose not to hit DEFCON 1 and let your Mt Vesuvius spew everywhere, while balancing on an earthquake during a hurricane. Oh come on, you know you have all been there.  I am not just being a drama queen here.

When those weather patterns start circling and I feel my temperature rising, I have to choose to step back.  Somedays I have packed all the right gear and can avoid the storm altogether. Other days it rushes up on you out of what seems like nowhere and I have to start with just being willing to be willing.

When I step up and say, God, I am willing to ask to be willing, I can almost hear see him slap and rub His hands together and say, “OK, Challenge accepted!”

I think that is why I love the amplified version of Psalms 119:34 & 35.  In those moments I am reaching out to God and saying my heart is pretty hard right now.  Please give me understanding, soften my heart teachable and make it teachable.  God, I am willing to put one foot in front of the other but please MAKE me walk in Your path.  I know in the end gray skies are gonna clear up and I will put on a happy face.

So the next time the weather alerts to possible storms ahead, grab your rain coat to show God you are at least willing to be willing and He will handle the rest.
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Somebody Call the Prayer Chain!

Galatians 6:2

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

Was your mama on the prayer chain?  When I was little our church had the prayer chain.  It was a list of prayer warriors and phone numbers.  Anything happened to anyone in our church you called one person on the list and it was then passed down to the next person.

I still remember my mama saying things like, “I better start the prayer chain!” when she would hear about a problem.  It was often the first she asked when she got to a sick person’s side, “Did anyone start the prayer chain?”

It is a legacy that she has taught to me and I am ever so thankful for.

Luckily, with today’s technology, the prayer chain is a little easier and quicker.  As a matter of fact, almost a year ago I started a little prayer group my husband so lovingly dubbed the Yada Yada Sisters.  He named us after a series of books by Neta Jackson called the Yada Yada Prayer Group.  If you haven’t read the books I would highly recommend them.

As a matter of fact, feel free to swish me to the side and go check them out on Amazon right now.  Don’t forget me though.  Come back when you are done. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Oh, glad to see you back.

As I was saying, we started out with six ladies all from different walks of life but linked by our church.  I had a problem one night and reached out to them in a group text.  The next thing I knew, we were adding ladies and not only sharing prayer requests but praise reports, jokes and recommendations on where to get your car fixed.  Nothing is too small or too large of a concern for this group.

I would love to show you a picture one of the ladies sent us today to make us all laugh.  It has been a rough week for many of us and we just needed to relax.  She, however, would probably kill me if I shared, but let’s just say imagine your worse hair day and multiply it by 1 million…lol! Her water heater went out and so no shower this morning and she has REALLY long curly hair.

I don’t know what I would do without these ladies.  They are the true walking talking manifestation of Paul’s orders to the Galatians to Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2 (NIV).

I pray you have people in your life you can depend on like my Yada Yada Sisters.  Please know even if you don’t, we are praying for each and every one of you.  I pray the Lord gives you strength and blesses you with his peace in every walk of your life.

Many blessings to you and yours,

The Yada Yada Sisters!
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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A Glimpse Through God’s Eyes

Psalms 18:29 (NIV)

With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall.

Last week I took my granddaughter to an indoor play area at our local mall.  Actually, we originally went there to get some yummy Chinese for lunch.  However, when she saw all the children running, jumping, climbing and screaming she looked at me with those big sparkling eyes and starting pointing and pleading, “Play MawMaw, play?!”  OK, this MawMaw’s heart melted in about 2.2 seconds and said, “Of course we will play honey.”

Now Baby-bop is petite for her age, but she is one tough little chickadee.  She is only one and a half, but she struts around like she is fully grown.  That is probably because she is around adults most of the time being an only child.

The play area was completely surrounded by a huge couch for adults to sit and relax on while their little monsters ran to and fro.  This MawMaw was still kind of leery of letting her precious little monster just go and play.  I mean there was some bigger kiddos in there.  The toys were huge and slippery.  By the way, who makes a play area where we tell you socks only and then makes all the climbing thingies slick and slippery.  I mean really??

When we first entered, Baby-bop must have been a little apprehensive as well.  She clung to my hand pretty tight and held blanky ever so closely as she sucked her thumb.  She watched the kids very carefully, cocking her head when she couldn’t quite figure out where they disappeared.  Then smiled when they came down a slide or out the other end of a tunnel.

Soon, she dropped my hand and wondered a little closer. Then she started giggling and clapping her hands as she watched several boys playing tag.  Before I knew it, blanky was left on the ground and she was screaming off into the distance.

Occasionally, she would turn and make sure I was still there.  Sometimes she would scream, “Look MawMaw” and point to something or simply want me to watch her.  A few times she came and grabbed my hand and pulled me over to make kids move out of the way or help her climb up something.

As I sat on that couch listening to her shouts of glee and occasional frustration, I saw a glimpse of us through God’s eyes.

I mean this must be what it is like for him to watch us take those first few steps into a new journey.  At first, we are frightened but we step out.  Then as we familiarize ourselves we slowly try new things, meet new people and then in a blink of His eye, we are off to the races.

Like my granddaughter, I hope you never forget help is always there.  Sometimes we just want to yell, “Look at me God, I’m doing it!”  Other times, we are racing back because we are curious or frustrated and need him to show us the way.  Yes, there are even times we come back hurt and crying.  But just like MawMaw, God will pick you up, cuddle you, dust you off and then send you back on your way.

You see even though it is nice and warm and safe cuddled in God’s arms, God knows we have to get back up and go again.  Yes, we could get hurt again, but we also get to love, learn and be filled with joy again too.  With his help we can advance against the troops; with our God, we can scale the walls!
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