I Need You to Just “Be”

Psalms 40:1
I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry.

I sat and listened as my friend poured out her heart and soul.  She was devastated, frustrated, angry and felt totally alone.

I remember a few years back this same friend had come to my rescue.  After a simple phone call at 10:00 at night, she showed up on my doorstep.  She wasn’t there to fix anything.  She was there just “to be”!

This concept of not fixing something can be very difficult for some people. Not to sound sexist or anything, I know for men it can be extremely difficult.  They are naturally born fixers and problem solvers.  However, there are many times we women don’t need “fixes” or even solutions.  We just need someone “to be”.

There are many times in life where there are no words to fix things. I am reminded of a song by Jason Gray, Not Right Now.

Don’t tell me when I’m grieving
That this happened for a reason
Maybe one day we’ll talk about the dreams that had to die
For new ones to come alive
But not right now

While I wait for the smoke to clear
You don’t even have to speak
Just sit with me in the ashes here
And together we can pray for peace
To the one acquainted with our grief

I know someday
I know somehow
I’ll be okay
But not right now
Not right now

This song always reminds me of Psalms 40:1. There are many times I wait for the Lord because I just want him to listen to my cry.  This verse tells us he turns to us and listens.  He is just there. We are not alone.  We are not forgotten.  He is listening. He is just “being”.

My response to my friend was simple.  I told her I was sorry. I wish I could fix it, but I know I can’t.  I could give her a million “Christian” things to say and verses of encouragement, but I knew they wouldn’t help, right now. So, I offered to just listen and empathize with her. I told her when she needed me to be her cheerleader and encourager I would, but today I was just going to sit with her and be miserable with her so she was not alone.  I was just going “to be”.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

We Were Not Called to Climb Every Mountain

Hebrews 12:1

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.  And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

I have come to the realization, I can’t live anyone else’s life and I don’t want to.

I have a friend who sells jewelry as a side job.  Her hopes and dreams are for it to take off so she can quit her full-time job.  She loves selling this jewelry.  She loves wearing it and she loves the smiles on her customers face when they first put it on and they realize they are beautiful!

Recently she made a confession to me.  She belongs to various social networking pages specifically designed for consultants that sell this jewelry.  She was reading peoples successes and she began to feel very jealous.  She wished she could be them. The Holy Spirit quickly pricked her soul and said, “No, you don’t!  You don’t want the trials and tribulations she has been or is going through.”

When she told me this I realized I have done the same thing many times.  I have looked at magazines or watched TV, social media or even just saw someone walking down the street.  I have said things like,

“I wished I looked like _________.”

“I wished I had that person’s _______.”

“Wow, I wish I could do _______ like that person.”

God has marked out a path just for us to travel.  He has equipped us with just what we need to walk that path.

And let us run with perseverance the race marked for us.

Why do some paths lead down pitfalls and rocky roads, while others seem to walk on rainbows and sunshine?  I don’t know, but I can promise you something, no one is always walking on either one.  When you see those people who seem to be on the high, you never know the cliffs they climbed to get there.  What’s more, you weren’t meant to make that climb.

Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.

Let us throw off the jealousy, envy, covetousness, enviousness, green-eyed monster, jealousy, resentment that entangles and let us find our own path of blessings, grace, mercy; favor, kindness, mitzvah, advantage, aid, assistance, gift, help, relief, support, comfort, consolation, solace; bonus, extra, delight, joy, and pleasure.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Love Doesn’t Mean Agree

Galatians 5:14-15For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.

I have lived through several Presidents. Each one has had his good points and bad points. Each one has had his supporters and his non-supporters. Unfortunately, over the years access to information and the ability to express one’s opinions on said information has sky rocketed. The last President and current President have had it the worst. FaceBook, Instagram, Twitter and any other number of social outlets have turned human beings into mortal enemies.

I am not going to get political here I promise. I don’t care who you voted for. I don’t care about your beliefs. What I do care about is your reactions to fellow human beings.

I am over joyed at the many pictures that are coming out right now of people helping people in Texas. No one is stopping to ask who you voted for? What is your sexual orientation? What are your religious beliefs? What color are you? Do you hate cops? Are you a thug? No, people are just reaching out a hand.

Loving your neighbor does not mean agreeing with him or her. Loving your neighbor does not mean liking who they are or what they do. Loving your neighbor means being willing to take the time to listen. Agree to disagree. Defending without offending. Yes, that last one is possible.

I am going to add one more I don’t care to this blog. I Don’t Care What Your Religious Beliefs Are! The above saying came out of the Bible, but you can find the concept in many other religions. For those nonreligious people, you can also say it is just plain old good common sense.

Loving one another makes peace. Hate does nothing but destroys us!

Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Frazzled

Philippians 3:13-14
Brothers, I do not consider myself to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and reaching forward to what is ahead, I pursue as my goal the prize promised by God’s heavenly call in Christ Jesus.

A dear lady named Hazel Straub from Crown of Glory International Ministries recently wrote this,

“Today is a new day. God calls for us to release old mindsets of fear, doubt, and unbelief. Stop complaining, instead of reigning. Release the trauma, drama and hurts of the past. This will make room for the good things, God wants to give you today.”

It seemed to fit my life on Sunday so well!

I serve as a greeter upstairs in our elementary school area at church. It is my job to check kids in and make sure child and parent have matching tags. Then at the end of service, I make sure anyone coming through the doors has a tag. Yep! I am a church bouncer! Ha-Ha-Ha! No, really it is a wonderful system that keeps all of our kiddos safe. Well, it is a wonderful system when the “system” is working.

My partner and I quickly ascertained that the computers were not going to cooperate. So we had to go old school and dig out the bracelets. We also improvised some name tags so small group leaders would know which kid was which.

Now, I have to tell you something. I am a little OCD. OK, OK, I am a LOT OCD! When things don’t go as planned I tend to get a little frazzled.

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My partner stepped up and looked at me with a grin and said, “Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape.” I started giggling and was able to pull an Elsa and Let it Go! Let it Go!

You know too often we let little stuff just pile up and get the best of us. It festers kind of like the popcorn hull I had stuck in my gum this morning. Ouch! How can something that small cause so much pain?!?!?!?

I know it is easy to get wrapped up in the past or even caught up in the moment. But really what good does it do us? Is my worrying going to make the situation go away or even get better? Nope!

So from now on, I am going to be the blessed flexible and not get all bent out of shape!

Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Go With The Flow

Proverbs 4:23
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Did you ever notice just how busy we really are all the time?

Let’s be real here.  We are all extremely busy people. I am not sure we even know how to slow down.  Even our vacations seem to get packed with must see’s or must do’s let alone everything it takes to get ready for a vacation. Oh, and don’t forget all the stuff waiting for us when we get back.

Recently, my husband and I went up to Wisconsin for my in-laws 50th wedding anniversary.  It was a weekend getaway.  Easy right?  One would think so.  Just grab a few things and get out of the house.  However, when I got home from work Friday night I still needed to pack and my work schedule that day seemed overwhelming.  So, I felt frantic.

When I walked in the door I was met with a frantic husband.  He had been home that day making sure the house was cleaned up and animals all taken care of for our house sitter.  Only thing was life had gotten in the way of all of his plans as well.  So, meet Mr. & Mrs. Frantic.

I should mention right now that we decided to take our not quite two-year-old granddaughter with us.  This was her first five-hour road trip. No one was quite sure what to expect.  I certainly didn’t expect to learn a very valuable lesson from her.

God tells us clearly to guard our hearts because everything flows from it.  Getting tired and overwhelmed is not good for our flow. When we don’t learn to recharge our bodies and our minds that nice quiet flow can turn into raging rapids.

You could say my husband and I were trapped in one of those raging rapids by the time we hit the road. Then, I saw my granddaughter.

During our trip, she laughed, pointed out the cows, the windmills and waved hi at everyone who passed. She played with her toes and sang her ABC’s. Then every once in a while she would yell Mawmaw! Mawmaw! To jibber jabber about something that caught her attention.  She was taking the time to enjoy the ride.

Five hours later, we pulled into our hotel. My husband and I were exhausted but she continued to smile.  We got to our hallway and ran into cousins she had never even met and she began sharing her cookies and laughing with them all.  After a long ride, she played hostess and made sure everyone got some love.

We walked into the room and she ran to one of the beds laying claim by putting baby and blanket promptly on top. I got her and I ready for bed and she climbed in, turned around, and flopped in the middle of all the pillows. She pulled the fluffy comforter up to her chin. She snuggled deep down and let out a great big mmmmmmmm!

My little baby bop didn’t let life dampen her adventure. She didn’t let five hours trapped in a car seat get her upset.  She didn’t hesitate to share love and joy with everyone around her. And at the end of the day, she sank in and let herself get swallowed up in the comfort of a great big fluffy bed. Without realizing it she was guarding her heart and love was flowing out.

For the rest of the trip, my husband and I took the time to just go with the flow. It is amazing the new tricks a not quite two-year-old can teach these two old dogs!

Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Let There Be Light…the End

Psalms 97:11
Light shines on the righteous and joy on the upright in heart.

So I began this journey talking about PTSD, anxiety, and depression. I then moved on to my seizures and two wonderful pups that were placed in my life. How do I connect all of this together? That is easy, God!

Only one of my seizure ever came back as epileptic. For many years, I was told my seizure activity was made up. The official term was pseudo-seizures. I had several doctors who truly made me feel like I was making it all up for attention. It wasn’t really their fault. Little was known about seizures at the time.

A few years ago, some new studies came out that linked pseudo-seizures with stress levels much in the same way they link migraines. As a matter of fact, I also suffer from migraines and my doctor said very often instead of coming out as a headache, sometimes my migraines were coming out as seizures.

These stressors can come in many different packages. I have environmental ones like certain foods I am allergic to as well as seasonal allergies. My body getting run down because of being sick or lack of sleep can become a trigger. Then there is the biggest one of all, life!

Annie was very good at noticing when I was getting stressed. She would often walk up to me and get me to pet her to take my mind off things. It was very calming and I can’t tell you how many seizures she helped me avoid by just calming me down. However, when those really difficult moments came and my PTSD kicked in I would get lost in the darkness. Even Annie struggled with how to bring me back.

I don’t know if it was because of the life he endured or if God just decided to equip him with a little extra light, but Meshach knows exactly what to do. Meshach runs to my side when he feels those anxieties creeping up inside me. When I am so frightened, reliving each and every moment of torment, he doesn’t let me walk alone. He cuddles me. He licks me. He simply stays right by my side and never takes his eyes off me. Just like when we first met.

God sends him to light the path for me. He is there to let me know I am not alone and we will get through this together. In the military, it is often referred to as “he’s got my six.” The really cool thing is I have his too. There are times when he leans into me when we are in a big crowd. I reach down, place my hand on his head and he looks up at me with those big brown eyes and I remind him, we are in this together. He lets out a slow breath, stands a little taller and we go on.

I don’t know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future. Right now God has chosen to show me his love and light through four big paws and a very wet nose.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

 

Let There Be Light Part 3

Job 22:28
What you decide on will be done, and light will shine on your ways.

We met at a shelter.

When he escaped the man who was trying to put him back in his cage and came and sat in front of me, I knew we had a destiny. I heard several different variations of his back story.  None of them were very nice.  All of them ended with him being at the shelter nearly starved to death at only 4 months old.  He was now 7 months old, very sweet, but he was very timid and didn’t trust people.  As a matter of fact, everyone was just as shocked as I that he came up and just sat in front of me the way he did.

The nice young man came and got him, apologizing to me.  He gently pushed the puppy into his cage and shut the door.  I walked past and then back again.  It was like watching one of those paintings that seem to follow you everywhere.  He would not take his big brown eyes off of me.

My husband thought I was joking and tried walking by to see if he would look at him instead.  All the little pup did was turn his head to try and view around my husband to get another look at me. I was his world and the exact person he had been waiting for.

We got him back out and played with him for a while.  We even took him out to romp in the yard.  He took me to all his favorite spots, stopping every few steps to make sure I was following him.  He brought me various toys and responded with sits and waiting patiently as I looked over each gift.

I left him at the shelter that day because we had several other dogs to look at but I have to say I felt just like him.  With every dog we went to see, I would look around them to see the vision I still had of that cute little boy etched in my mind.

I spent the next morning going over the three dogs we had narrowed it down to.  I explained each one to my mom as we went for our daily walk.  I didn’t realize it at the time, but I really wasn’t giving her much detail about the other two.  As a matter of fact, I would make a comment about them and then say something to compare them to that cute little boy.

I remember my mom looking at me when I was done and saying, “I think you made up your mind and will be heading back to the shelter when we are done here.”  Did I ever tell you my mom is a very wise woman?

I took the paperwork and called my husband on the way to the shelter to let him know I was going to pick the puppy up.  When I got there everything fell into place like God himself had already laid out every step and was shining his light on the path.

What normally takes a couple of days to get approved, took me a couple of hours.  When they brought him out he sat across the room and smiled at me and wagged his tail in delight but he would not come to me at first.  I called him by his name they had given him but he stayed put.

Once again the Holy Spirit intervened with a loving but well-placed thump to my head.  He lovingly reminded me how we always said if we ever got a boy dog we would name him Meshach. So, I looked into his big brown eyes across the waiting room and smiled and said, “Hi, Meshach!”  He broke free from his handler and ran top speed right into my arms.

So about now I am guessing you are wondering about the seizures.  Well, if you remember I had been walking with my mom that morning and we had put in six miles.  I had not eaten much for breakfast and it was now nearly one in the afternoon.  Needless to say, my sugar levels were dropping.

I was sitting on the floor in a little room with Meshach while they finalized the paperwork.  He was entertaining himself by watching the kittens through the glass.  He stopped all of a sudden and walked over to me and put his paws on my shoulders and went nose to nose with me.  I started to shake all over and he just sat on top of me and started licking my face.  Once again God had equipped a dog with the power to know when my seizures were coming and how to best handle me.

What I didn’t know was God had equipped him with so much more!

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Come back tomorrow to read more of our story!
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Let There Be Light Part 2

Psalms 67: 1 & 2
May God be gracious to us and bless us and make his face shine upon us, that your ways may be known on earth, your salvation among all nations.

This was not my first service dog. As a matter fact, my first answer to prayer had come eleven years before. Let me back up a little.

It was September of 2006. I had spent the last thirteen years going from doctor to doctor and trying a long list of medicines to control my seizures. Nothing was working and I had enough. I gave up all meds and decided to try a totally different avenue.

After lots of research and prayer, I chose to seek out the assistance of a service dog. My doctor at the time refused to sign off for me to get one from a company who trained seizure response dogs. As a matter of fact, he didn’t believe in them and told me he thought it was a bunch of “Hooey” and yes that was his professional opinion!

With the help of the company and lots of lessons from other sources, I learned how to train service dogs. So, we went on a search for the perfect dog. We called it operation Annie. My mother-in-law’s best friend had passed away and she was all about children and animals. I wanted to honor her memory.

My husband and I walked into a local shelter to just take a look. I remember I was on the phone with a friend walking around when my husband stopped in front of me. I heard him laughing. He had tried to walk by a cage and a cute little puppy reached out and grabbed him and wouldn’t let go.

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We escorted the little bundle of brown fur to a play area. She was all over my husband and would have nothing to do with me. I thought there was no way this dog was going to make a good service dog for me. However, my husband was in love and there was no telling him no.

So as he went to sign the papers and pay, I was left sitting in a little fenced in area. It was a showdown. We stared at each other. I hated the name they had given her. I sat there trying to decide what name we should give her. I swear I felt the Holy Spirit hit me upside the back of the head and say, “I don’t know what about Annie!” I felt like an idiot, but I looked at her and said, “Hi, Annie.” She leaped across the space between us and fell into my lap giving me the facial of all facials. That was just the beginning of many miracles yet to come.

Within the first week of owning this 6-week old chocolate lab/German pointer mix, she alerted to two seizures. Now let me explain something to you. You cannot train a dog to alert to a seizure. It is a rare thing for them to be able to pick up on them ahead of time. When you train a dog, you simply train them to respond once you start having one. This little thing dug her heels and would not walk another step, turned and jumped up on me before I had a seizure. I can only explain this with one word, God!

Over the next ten years, she served me well. She not only would give me a 15 to 30 minutes heads up, but she also learned how to make me start breathing again. It happened when she was quite small. She watched my mother push in on my diaphragm when I quit breathing during a seizure. The next time it happened she jumped on me trying to push in the same spot. When she realized it wasn’t working, she got frustrated and she bit me. It shocked me right out of it and I began to breathe again. Again, I can only sum this up as God!

Annie was a blessing to so many people. God truly shined his light through her everywhere she went.  She worked with kids with emotional issues as a therapy dog. She alerted to not only my seizures but also a student of mine’s, a substitute teacher’s I worked with and my son’s. She helped educate our community about service dogs and spent many hours in hospitals and nursing homes comforting people.

In 2015, Annie became very ill. When she finally bounced back she wasn’t the same dog. Her ‘get up and go’ was a little slower, her tail wagged a little less and she began to bump into things. Annie was going blind. We both knew it was time to find a replacement, but how was I ever going to replace her. The love of my life. The saver of my life many times over.

It would take lots of prayers, lots of dogs and seven months of searching. To paraphrase Bogart in Casablanca, “Of all the shelters in all the towns, in all the world, I walked into his.”

Come back tomorrow for more of my story.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Let There Be Light Part​ 1

Genesis 1:3
Let there be light. 

John 8:12
I am the light of the world.

How do you explain PTSD, anxiety, or depression to someone who has never been there?

How do you tell someone watching their loved one suffer that they cannot help or make it go away?  It isn’t their fault.  They did nothing wrong. Don’t take it personally. Their loved one is fighting their demons and they just got caught in the crossfire.

How do you tell someone if I could get out of bed, or off this couch, I would?  If I could quit crying, I would.  If I could stop flying off the handle, I would.  If I could. I would.

No. I didn’t choose to be this way today.  No. I haven’t gotten up on the wrong side of the bed.  No. I am not just feeling a little blue.  No. It isn’t just that time of the month. No. I am not angry at you.

How do I explain how I fee? I feel like I am trying to sweep a dirt floor in the middle of a hurricane.  I can hear everyone around me trying to explain it is a dirt floor.  I know the more I sweep the more dirt I will find.  I hear you scream out, “Why in the heck are you doing this?” while the wind whips around me depositing even more dirt.  But. I. Still. Sweep. And sweep.  And sweep.  I can’t stop.  The broom keeps moving and my hands are glued to it.  I can’t even look up to take a breath.  I. Must. Sweep.

There are no remedies to these problems.  There are no cure-alls.  There is just coping.  Getting through.  Today I would like to let you in on a few of my getting throughs.

Please let me start by explaining there are many medications that can help with the chemical imbalances that occur with PTSD, anxiety, and depression.  My body just doesn’t play well with any of them.  For those they work for, Praise God!  I am so excited for you. I have family and friends who find help in this area.

When I finally figured out meds were not for me, I reached out to others.  I prayed so hard for God to just take it all away. He chose to send me some help instead.  He put people in my life who understood.  People I could turn to in the darkness, who would hold my hand and walk with me. They became lights in my darkness.

I appreciate those people more than they will ever know or understand.  I know I can text and call them at the drop of a hat and they are there. But I didn’t want to always be dependent on them.  That is when God stepped in and said, “Let there be light!”

My light came in the form of four big paws and a very wet nose.  He, like me, ​had gone through some very unpleasant things in his life and was looking for just the right person to love him.

To learn more of my story come back tomorrow.
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Who Can Compete With Me?

Galatians 6:4

Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else 

John Lennon sang a song called Imagine.  In one of the verses, he sings:

Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people living life in peace, you

Basically, he is saying what if we could get rid of all of our differences and have no competition. Now, he also goes on to say he realizes he is just a dreamer, but he hopes more people have this dream too.

Competition and differences are a part of life.  As you read this, I am competing for your time.  I mean there are million other things you could be doing, right?

So what does the bible say about competing or competition? Well I found a couple of references

1 Corinthians 9:25
Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.

2 Timothy 2:5
Similarly, anyone who competes as an athlete does not receive the victor’s crown except by competing according to the rules.

and then there, of course, are some on running a race

2 Timothy 4:7
I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.

1 Corinthians 9:24
Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

Then there is my favorite

Hebrews 12:1
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us

I love this verse because for me one of the biggest hinders is the competition itself.  I want to compare myself to everyone around me.

I was a marathon runner and one thing I learned early on was to quit comparing myself to everyone else and work on my own personal best.  When I concentrated on what everyone else around me was doing I would just get frustrated and angry because I couldn’t match their abilities.  When I concentrated on competing with myself I would find victories over time I ran just a little faster or longer.

My competing with everyone around me became a hindrance that led to a sin of jealousy and envy.  I began to get angry and others.  It is so easy to fall into that entanglement and the world does not help with this.  Just turn on the TV, log on to social media or open a magazine and you will see some beautiful woman who has it all together.  All of a sudden you look at yourself and you are too short, too tall, too fat, too thin. Your kids aren’t perfect enough.  Your spouse doesn’t love you enough.  Your house isn’t fancy and way too messy. You need more money for a new car or fancy vacation. There are millions of other comparisons you can make.

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Let’s take a moment with John Lennon and imagine there is a place where we don’t compare ourselves to others.  Instead, we just work on competing with ourselves.  We take each day to make it a little brighter than the day before.  We move a few steps closer to a goal we have set.  We celebrate our victories each night when we realize even if the day wasn’t perfect, we survived it and are going to get up tomorrow and try again.

Let’s test our own actions. Then we can take pride in ourselves alone, without comparing ourselves to someone else. (Galatians 6:4) 

We haven’t finished the race, but we haven’t quit either. That is a victory worth celebrating!
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.