Tag: Discipline

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Pick Your Battles​​

Deuteronomy 2: 19 & 24
   19. Do not harass them or provoke them to war.
   24. Begin to take possession of it and engage them in battle.

You may have heard the saying, “Pick your battles.” It is so true when raising kids or in any kind of relationship. There are some things that just aren’t worth the fight.

Then there are those times when you don’t need to be in battle at all. There are lots of attacks around you that if you tried to go into battle, on your own, you would lose! These are battles God did not intend for you to take on. They may be something like a co-worker who seems out to get you, or a supervisor who hates you. If you fight back, you look like the bad guy.

Then there are battles God says, “Go Get’em, Tiger! This is your battle and your victory! I will deliver this battle to you!”

The key to the battle is listening for God to tell you, “CHARGE!” Don’t rush in and try to fight on your own. Sometimes, you may not fight at all because it is not your battle. Sometimes God may do all the fighting for you. Other times, it may not be the right time for the battle.

Kind of reminds me of the old Kenny Rogers song, The Gambler

You’ve got to know when to hold ’em
Know when to fold ’em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run
You never count your money
When you’re sittin’ at the table
There’ll be time enough for countin’
When the dealin’s done

No matter what the circumstances, you need to let God Pick Your Battle!

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Copyright © 2018 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Attitudes and Behaviors

Isaiah 26:3
You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.

I supervise candidates who want to become special education teachers. When I have to go in and observe them they are nervous. They always worry about…

What if the kids don’t behave?
What they aren’t engaged?
What if they refuse to cooperate?

I remind them I am not observing their students. I am observing them. They are not in control of the students’ actions. They can teach the perfect lesson. They can have the perfect behavior management plan. They can have the perfect classroom routines. However, their students still have total control over their attitudes and behaviors. I am there to see how my student teachers react to the behaviors.

God is the perfect parent. He gave us a perfect world. However, Adam and Eve were in control of their behavior and attitude. Where did that get them? They made their choices. It was all on their heads (and hearts).

So, what about us? Our circumstances are not always our doing. We cannot always control them. However, we can always control how we handle them. We have control over two very important things…our attitude and our behavior.

It really is OK when our world is crumbling around us. We don’t have to keep it all together. No, WE can’t keep it all together. Only God himself can juggle all the situations swirling around us. What WE control is our attitude and behavior in the midst of the storm.

Copyright © 2018 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Thank You for Traveling that Road

Philippians 1:6
Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

No one’s life is all rainbows and unicorns. We all face painful moments that rock out entire world in a matter of seconds.

These moments will change you forever. So let them change you for the good.  Let them make you smarter, stronger, and grace filled. 

Through these times of trials and tribulations you just might be molding into the person God is preparing as the answer to someone’s prayer. Someone is going to need your wisdom, knowledge and most important empathy when they travel the road behind you.

Right now you may not see the end of the tunnel, but I know the LORD can. He is right next to you every step breathing life into your present and future. He is shining HIS light in the darkest places. Hold on tight. 

He is NOT going to leave you or forsake you. His grip is very tight and He will not drop you. No uncertainty, no broken dreams, and NO FEAR can keep you from Him.

Kick, scream, cry, throw a tantrum if you must. But then straighten your crown, remind Satan just who you are and keep moving.

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Copyright © 2018 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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Who is driving the bus?

Psalms 29:11
The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace.

I went to a new doctor today.  After many years of seeing the same doctor, I had gotten quite comfortable with myself.  My doctor was a good friend of mine.  Unfortunately, he had to move his practice far enough away that I was no longer able to see him.

I have known about this move for six months.  I have been on this new doctor’s list for about 4 months or so, but I had not gone in to see him.  I hate meeting new doctors.

Now, I do realize no one likes to go to the doctors.  I mean we don’t usually wake up and say…gee I wonder what my doctor is doing today.  I think I should make an appointment to see him.

However, I HATE going to the doctor’s office and I REALLY HATE seeing a new doctor!!!!!!

I have quite a few issues.  If you have read my older blogs you know one of them is seizures.  I have not seen a neurologist in over 10 years because I gave up on them.  So, I really hate discussing that problem, but I was expecting it.  I also have two types of arthritis, asthma and Crohn’s disease. Again, I don’t like going over my history and what I am currently doing about them, but I was expecting it.

What I wasn’t expecting to discuss, my PTSD.

Before you ask, no my PTSD is not combat PTSD. I was not in the military. I wish my doctor would have asked that and just left it there. But NO! He wants to dive into what trauma in my life could have caused my PTSD.

Here is my theory on PTSD.  It is kind of like Fight Club (movie reference). The first rule about Fight Club is you don’t talk about Fight Club!  Yep! That sums up my feeling on my PTSD! Unfortunately, this new doctor did not agree.

***INSERT MELTDOWN HERE***

Now you would think someone who is writing her dissertation on PTSD was comfortable with her own fight.  Well, most of the time I am.  Unfortunately, the nature of PTSD does not leave you in control.  You do not get to pick and choose how you will feel or respond. I have spoken in front of people before concerning my PTSD.  Today, however, was just a day that PTSD was driving the bus and it was racing out of control very quickly!

Flashbacks flooded my head.  I was crying the entire way home.  None of my mind techniques would work.  My service dog clung to me to try and make me feel safe and distract my mind.

I would love to tell you my first thoughts were some beautifully worded prayer that would tickle the ear of any Christian.

Nope!

I screamed at God! I screamed, “Why?”

I screamed, “How could you?”

I screamed, “Where are you?”

I screamed, “WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT THIS!!!!”

What did I hear back? The Holy Spirit brought to my mind Psalms 29:11.   He said I am giving you strength because you are mine.  I am blessing you with peace.  Accept it. Sit back and let me take control of the bus!

My heart stopped racing.  My anger subsided.  Reality began to return.

Thank you, Lord, for your strength and peace. You were with during the trauma.  You held my hand and screamed and cried with me.  You still hold my hand as you fill me with your strength and peace.

My voice has been heard by many young men and women.  My story has been shared before.  I have been the voice of the voiceless.  I wish I would not have gone through my trauma, but I am glad that I survived. For if my journey can save even one person from giving in to the darkness, then I would gladly do it all over again.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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When in Doubt…Phone a Friend!

Psalm 37:30-31
30 The godly offer good counsel;
they teach right from wrong.
31 They have made God’s law their own,
so they will never slip from his path.

Do you remember the game show, Who Wants to be a Millionaire?

A player was asked a series of multiple-choice questions of increasing (or, in some cases, random) difficulty. Large cash prizes were offered for correctly answering each level. There were three lifelines you could use if you got stuck on a question: 50/50, ask the audience and phone a friend.

Today, I found myself stuck at one of those questions in life that I could not answer. As a matter of fact, the more I thought about it, the more frustrated I got.

Now, I know as a Christians we are called to go right to the source, pray and read the bible to find your answer. However, sometimes I just need that human contact. I need to be able to phone a friend.

God was prepared for that! I have been blessed with a group of friends I can call when I need them. They provide Godly counsel.

My phone a friend was not only able to talk me off the ledge today, but gave me a new perspective. I was able to see my situation from different viewpoints.

I pray that you have Godly counsel and if not I will continue to pray that God brings someone into your life. I will also pray you will fill those shoes for someone else.

So keep those phone lines open! I just might need to phone a friend.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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What’s My Motivation?

Proverbs 15:28
The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil.

Recently I head someone explain how she had gotten hurt by something a friend had said. She wanted to go all Chuck Norris on this friend, but then took a breath and stepped back. She asked her self why was she really angry with this person. What was her motivation for wanting to go and yell and scream at this friend?

Can you imagine for a moment if we all took the time to ask ourselves this question every time we started to open our mouths? What a different world we would live in!

I am not saying there are not times we need to be firm or get a point across, but even those types of situations have ways of working out better when the words used are kind and considerate.

I know as a teacher when my kiddos are getting a little out of control, I do not speak louder. Instead, I begin to speak quieter. Yes, there may be a firm tone in my voice but it is still gentle and soothing. They calm down and are usually ready in a few moments to explain to me, in a much calmer way, what happened.

I am not for one minute saying I have this all figured out. Just ask my hubby. There are many arguments where I speak first and think later. Oh man, now not only did I admit to that, but he has it in writing…lol!

I am going to end this with one more saying I heard this week…

“When you put your mind in neutral, don’t leave your lips in drive!”

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

 

 

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Learn to Fly!

2 Timothy 4:18
The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory for ever and ever. Amen.

I am reading Anxious For Nothing: Finding Calm in a Chaotic World, by Max Lucado. In his book, he talks about an acrobatic team.  The flyer explains how the key to their success is remembering he is a flyer and his partner is the catcher.  His job is just to jump and let his partner do all the catching.  It is dangerous for him to try and catch his catcher when he jumps.  It simply is not his job!

Max goes on to compare that to our relationship with God.  We have to put our full trust in him.  Let God do his job! “Your Father has never dropped anyone. He will not drop you. His grip is sturdy and his hands are open.” It is not our job to control things.  we must let go and Let God!  As Max puts it, a wonderful thing happens when we let go and let God, we FLY!

Paul went through some pretty horrific moments in his lifetime.  If anyone deserved to have fear and trepidation in their walk with God, I am saying Paul had reasons.  However, Paul never questioned any of the positions he was left in.  Not when he was stoned, ran out of town, or thrown in prison several times.  Instead, he went out of his way to encourage Timothy and the church by saying,

The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory for ever and ever. Amen. (2 Timothey 4:18)

Wow!  Can you sit back and let that sink in for just a moment? I mean really let that sink in!  No matter what we are facing in our lives, God is there. No job, God is there. Cancer, God is there. Divorce, God is there.  He will rescue you from every evil attack and will bring you safely to his heavenly kingdom.

What does that rescue look like?  I don’t know.

How long will it take? I don’t know.

What I do know is he has promised to catch me.  All I have to do is Fly!

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

 

 

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Hang on! Call on! Move on!

First I would like to apologize for not blogging the past couple of days. I have been battling the stomach flu.

It is amazing just how horrible you can feel from a little itty bitty microscopic thing! This dude can bring you to your knees in a matter of minutes! I am not ashamed to say I found myself in the fetal position praying God heal me or take me now, don’t leave me like this!

I was physically in pain, but have you ever been in so much emotional pain that you felt this way. Well, I know a couple of guys in the bible that did!

Jonah was:

Jonah had gone out and sat down at a place east of the city. There he made himself a shelter, sat in its shade and waited to see what would happen to the city. Then the LORD God provided a leafy plant and made it grow up over Jonah to give shade for his head to ease his discomfort, and Jonah was very happy about the plant. But at dawn the next day God provided a worm, which chewed the plant so that it withered. When the sun rose, God provided a scorching east wind, and the sun blazed on Jonah’s head so that he grew faint. He wanted to die, and said, “It would be better for me to die than to live.”

But God said to Jonah, “Is it right for you to be angry about the plant?”

“It is,” he said. “And I’m so angry I wish I were dead.”

But the LORD said, “You have been concerned about this plant, though you did not tend it or make it grow. It sprang up overnight and died overnight. And should I not have concern for the great city of Nineveh, in which there are more than a hundred and twenty thousand people who cannot tell their right hand from their left—and also many animals?”
–Jonah 4:5-11

Elijah also had his issues:

Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the Gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.
Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die.

“I have had enough, LORD,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”

1 Kings 19:1-4

If these two great prophets can have issues that make them feel overwhelmed and distressed why don’t we think it is OK for us to feel that way sometimes too?

We are all going to go through periods of our lives that seem like too much to carry. The important thing is to hang on, call on and move on.

Hang on…James 1:12 Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.

Call on…Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Move on…Philippians 3:14 I run straight toward the goal to win the prize that God’s heavenly call offers in Christ Jesus.

Don’t give up! Never Surrender! Simply Hang on, Call on and Move on!

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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My Very Cold Cup of Coffee

Luke 10:38-42 (TLB)

38 As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem[a] they came to a village where a woman named Martha welcomed them into her home. 39 Her sister Mary sat on the floor, listening to Jesus as he talked.

40 But Martha was the jittery type and was worrying over the big dinner she was preparing.

She came to Jesus and said, “Sir, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”

41 But the Lord said to her, “Martha, dear friend, you are so upset over all these details! 42 There is really only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it—and I won’t take it away from her!”

First, I want to apologize for not blogging on Friday. I had a jam-packed day and honestly did not even remember until I was falling into bed at 1:30 Saturday morning.

That brings me to today…I have felt like I have been chasing myself all day long and I am a quick little sucker! I have been at least 10 steps behind the entire time. I would just feel like I was making ground and BOOM! There I go taking off again into twenty different directions.

My day started at 6:00 am. It is 2:50 in the afternoon and I just sat down to take a breath and enjoy my now very cold cup of coffee. However, I can finally see my desk. My emails have been answered. Copies are made and lesson plans are done. Whew!

I think I know how Martha felt. I have been that jittery type all day long fretting over all the details of my day. I unfortunatly also know how Martha felt. I did not take time this morning to just spend time with God. I rushed through my morning and didn’t even say good morning God.

I wonder if I had been a little more like Mary at the beginning of my day, I wouldn’t have ended up like Martha the rest of it. I am pretty sure my to-do list would not have gotten any smaller or magically disappeared. But maybe, just maybe, I would have caught up with myself and wouldn’t have felt so jittery. Maybe I wouldn’t be “enjoying” my very cold cup of coffee right now.

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

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You Can Feel…

Matthew 14:13a
As soon as Jesus heard the news, he went off by himself in a boat to a remote area to be alone.

When Jesus heard John the Baptist had been killed, he was sad. Yes, Jesus was sad. He needed to be alone, so he went away to a place of solitude. He needed a moment to feel his feelings and work through them before continuing on with his ministry.

So why do we think we are not allowed to do the same?

Why do we think we must be these superhuman Christians who must carry on no matter what?

I know people mean well when they are trying to cheer me up. I have tried very hard to make people feel better too. However, sometimes I really just want to be left alone. I want to, no I NEED to just feel my pain.

I have tried to be little Miss Pollyanna with the ever-present smile. Trying to please all of the people all of the time. It doesn’t work. It is not healthy and contrary to what some would have you believe it is NOT what Jesus would do.

It is OK to tell people no. It is OK to go find a place of solitude. And it is ok to be sad. Jesus did and isn’t it our goal to be just like him?

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Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.