Anger Archives - Tabetha’s Devotions

May 15, 2019May 15, 2019

Listen…

James 1:19

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry

Quick to listen.

Slow to speak.

Slow to become angry.

I know this is the go-to verse for holding your temper. I believe it is much more than that though. It says, slow to speak. How many times do I offer my advice or try to fix things when I should just be there for someone? How many times have I gossiped about someone or something? How many times have I stuck my nose in somewhere where it doesn’t belong? Slow to anger is just part of this verse. Listening and knowing when to speak and when to just listen are also part of this verse.

July 6, 2018

Not a Fair Weather Friend

Matthew 28:20
Lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.

Good Days, Bad Days
Happy Days, Sad Days
Every Days, All Days

We have all seen those stories (and a few of us may have lived them) where a person comes into money or fame and so called “friends” start popping up all over the place. Unfortunately, when the money and fame run out, so do those friends!

Thank goodness we have a true friend who doesn’t run out when the good times do. The original Greek word used for “always” in Matthew 28:20 literally means “all the days”. Jesus meant he would be with us through All Our Days. This includes all of our circumstances, good and bad.

He is there in those deep dark places, where we think we will never see the light again. When the tears are coming so hard, you can’t even take a breath, he is there. Yes, he is even there when we don’t want to take another breath. You may not feel him or see him, but he is there fighting for you and loving you every step of the way.

This verse reminds me of my mom’s favorite poem, “Footprints.”

Our LORD is with us no matter what we face today. He is walking right beside us and sometimes even carries us. He is NOT a fair weather friend.

July 2, 2018

Express It and Confess It!

Psalm 46:1
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

Did you know you can’t surprise God? Yep, no surprise parties for Him.

Everything you do and don’t do,
Everything you feel and don’t feel,
Everything you think and don’t thing,
He knows it all and is NOT surprised by it.

I came to grips with this a few years back when I was angry at God. My husband came home, on my 10th wedding anniversary, to tell me he was in love with someone else and he wanted a divorce. Here I was all dressed up and ready to go out for a nice dinner. He was two hours late, with no phone call or text, and these were the first words out his mouth. I am pretty sure I had a right to be upset.

I was upset with him, of course, but truth was, I was also angry with God.

I had two choices. One, be the “good little Christian” I was taught to be in my Sunday School class as a child and keep it all boxed up. Put a bow on top and smile my way through it. Two, stomp off to my room give out a wail of an ugly cry and yell and scream at God. Throw the temper tantrums of all tantrums.

Want to guess what I did? If you guessed two, you would be correct!

It was all right there in my heart. God knew it already. I might as well express it! I gave Him both barrels. I may have even thrown in a cuss word here and there.

You know what I found out? God has big shoulders. Confessing to Him every little detail was healing. Hiding it and pretending it doesn’t exist doesn’t make it go away. Your pain will find you!

God was not offended by my brutal honesty. As a matter of fact, I think He is more offended when we hide it. It is like we are out and out lying to His face! We are no better than Adam and Eve trying to hide in garden.

The next time you feel those emotions boiling inside, express them and confess them. Pour out your heart to God. He is our strong refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

June 25, 2018

You Must Step into Freedom

Galatians 5:1
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let ourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

I sat there reliving the moment over and over again. I felt the guilt and anguish. I had really screwed up! I had let my anger get the best of me and I had lashed out at my son, again!

It wasn’t the first time and I am ashamed to say it wasn’t the last either.

When my kids were growing up, I had no idea I had PTSD. I was diagnosed with depression, anxiety and even bipolar disorder, but no one had even thought of non-combat PTSD.

Non-combat. What does that even mean? It is another label they put on me to let others know that although I have PTSD, it isn’t military related. To us with PTSD, that label has no meaning. We all know the trauma we went through and how it affects each and every one of us.

Most importantly, we know the guilt we carry around because of it.

When the battle is over and the smoke clears, I see the damage I have done. I see the casualties of my sickness. I have to pick up the pieces and try to put them together again.

You don’t have to have PTSD to have these feelings. Any argument can leave you with feelings of guilt. Feelings of would of, could of and should of. It doesn’t matter who was right or who was wrong. The damage is done and no one wins.

Later, as you do pick up those pieces and the mending process starts, the guilt never seems to leave. Oh, it goes away for awhile. But then you are laying there in bed and the darkness creeps in around you. It whispers how wrong you were.

How could you have done that!

No one will ever really forgive you for that!

You are the worst person ever!

You don’t deserve to be forgiven!

You are so stupid!

These words are NOT from God!

Let me repeat that…THESE. WORDS. ARE. NOT. FROM. GOD!

Christ draws us closer to him through conviction. The Holy Spirit prompts us to make corrections in our life. Condemnation brings only darkness into our lives leaving us with more problems and no solutions.

Christ came to set us free from condemnation. He knew we were going to have “those days.” He knew we were going to face “those issues.” He also knew we wouldn’t always choose the right way to handle them. He came so we wouldn’t be held captive by our bad choices forever. We would have freedom to stand up, dust ourselves off and try again.

Our past is a chance for a teaching moment, it should not be a punishment moment. Discipline comes with love, mercy and grace. Punishment comes with hate, evil and condemnation.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let ourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery (Galatians 5:1). Learn from your mistakes and move on. Don’t live as a slave to them for the rest of your life. Christ has opened the door of your cell, but you have to step out into the sunshine.

June 1, 2018

Sit Still in the Dark

Exodus 14:14 NIRV
The Lord will fight for you. Just be still.

When you are in a fight with someone it is so hard to sit still. When that person you are fighting with is yourself it is impossible.

I have spent all of my adult life fighting myself. Mental illnesses is a two-edged sword. You often fight with people around you, never meaning to. Then you turn and fight yourself because of the guilt. You tell yourself the meanest things. Things you would never tell another human being. You hate yourself. For me it is often like an out of body experience. I see the way I am acting and scream but can’t stop myself.

Over the years, I have found the only way I make it through my “episodes” is to sit still. When all those angry voices in my head come to bully me once again, I sit still. It does me know good to fight back. I can’t fight myself. There is nowhere to run or hide. I must sit still. God fights for me. He doesn’t let go. I may not see him or feel him, but he comes for me. He always does.

I have translated these thoughts into other areas of my life. There are times when I need to stand up and fight. However, there are other times God says, “I got this! Sit still and let me fight!” It is in those moments, I am still learning, but always trying to listen. I know how important it is to sit still.

Deep Down Inside
by Tabetha Frick

Imprisoned
Shackled
Darkness surrounds
Deep down inside

Those words are harsh
They cut like a knife
No longer in control
Deep down inside

Why don’t they stop
Can’t they see the pain
Its so dark
Deep down inside

The tears are streaming
The anger is raging
Why is it so dark
Deep down inside

I hear my voice
I try to scream
I am here in the dark
Deep down inside

Too late now
The damage is done
I must wait in the dark
Deep down inside

The light will come
It always does
But for now I wait
Deep down inside

May 30, 2018

The Wrong Side of the Bed

Colossians 4:5-6
Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

Boy did I wake up on the wrong side of the bed!

I actually considered crawling back in and getting out on the other side…hahaha!

My poor husband. I was neither wise in my actions, nor were my words seasoned or full of grace. As a matter of fact, I felt so badly that I arranged to have lunch with him to refresh our day. I am happy to report that it did.

We all have those days. Maybe something went wrong to throw your day off. Maybe you didn’t sleep well or woke up sick. It doesn’t matter what started it. It is how you finish it.

I know taking words back is like putting toothpaste back in the tube. If like me, you let things get out of control before you could get a hold of them, then make up for it. I know this isn’t always possible, but try.

Whenever possible, be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone (Colossians 4:5-6). But when it is not and the damage is done please remember foolish people laugh at making things right when they sin. But honest people try to do the right thing (Proverbs 14:9, NIRV).

May 14, 2018

I Am Free!

Colossians 3:13-14
Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

On the way in to work this morning, I was having a chat with God. I am struggling with how to resolve a relationship issue I have with a couple of people in my life. I got my usual answer of “Be still, Tabetha and let me do my thing!” Then I got a startling reminder of my adventure through a twelve step program.

Yes, I once went through a twelve step program. It doesn’t matter if you are an overeater, alcoholic, gambler or porn addict, addiction is addiction and the twelve steps do help. I can even say that if you are just struggling with life the twelve steps help.

Anyway, back to my conversation with God!

He reminded me of a very important piece to the program or at least to a couple of the steps. Steps 8 and 9 are what most people refer to as the make amends steps. They state:

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Now, let me state right now, YES these steps are difficult! However, as God reminded me today they are even harder when you are seeking recognition from the other person. Someone once put it to me like this… “We are only responsible for our side of the street.”

This means, that I am responsible for MY forgiving and MY being sorry for my part in my relationship. I cannot expect forgiveness from them, nor can I expect an apology. More importantly, once I have given my forgiveness and apology I am FREE! I don’t have to carry around the guilt or anger any more. If the relationship does not mend, it is OK. I did what I needed to do. I can walk away a free woman.

LORD, I know it is my responsibility to forgive other people when they sin against me, so YOU will also forgive me (Matthew 6:14). Help me to move on LORD, knowing that I have done what you asked and I am free.

April 27, 2018

Filled With Hate, But I Must Wait

Lamentations 3:26
it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.

Ever find yourself in a conversation and you are ready! You are poised! You have a million things you want to spew out of your mouth like Mount St. Helen!

You feel every word of it is true and valid. Sure, they are laced with meanness, spite, hate and maybe a little vengeance. But it is justified right?! You have been hurt, wronged and you deserve to retaliate.

Then that small, still voice whispers in your ear.

“Don’t do it. I know you are hurt. I know they wronged you. By the world’s view, you have every right to retaliate. But this is my fight, not yours. I want you to be still before me and wait patiently; do not fret that they succeed in their ways, when they carried out their wicked schemes” (Psalms 37:7).

I find myself in that situation today. Believe me, it has taken some extra strength Holy Spirit duct tape to close this mouth. I can also tell you the only way I am getting through this is repeating over and over and over again Lamentations 3:26, “it is good to wait quietly. For the salvation of the Lord.”

When that burn inside starts to churn and I feel all those words wanting to blow, I close my eyes and through gritted teeth, I repeat the verse. I pray. I tell God, I am stepping back and trying to wait quietly for you to save me.

I would love to be able to end this post with a beautiful rainbow and unicorn scene. Tell you it became easier and easier and now I am not even thinking of the person or the hurt they brought to my life.

But, I can’t.

The truth is, I am still in the middle of this battle. I am fighting! I am not going to give up! But, I am still in the middle.

If you are in the middle of a battle right now, I would love to link arms and pray with you. We can wait together quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

March 8, 2018

Brick by Brick

2 Corinthians 4:8-9
8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.

I am struggling today with a couple of personal issues. My father is in the hospital with pneumonia. Praise God he is doing well, but it was quite a fright for all of us last night.

While in the ER, I received some life-altering news that part of my dissertation examination was rejected. Besides feeling like a failure, I am not sure where this path is leading me.

What I do know is this, there is a plan for me. I may not see the path right now but it is being laid out brick by brick.

I don’t know what you are going through today, but I woke up this morning after a horrible day and the Son still shined! He brought me these verses for comfort and now I pray them over you.

14 For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15 from whom every family[a] in heaven and on earth derives its name. 16 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:14-19

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January 10, 2018

Who Cares?!?!

Psalms 27:1
The Lord is my light and my salvation — whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life — of whom shall I be afraid?

January is a rotten time of year. Every commercial seems to scream “You are fat!” I don’t care if you are watching TV, scrolling social media, reading your email or picking up a magazine. You are bombarded with this message.

Then there are all the other messages that tell you are unorganized, lazy, or totally in debt.

I am not saying some of these things aren’t true, but there is one huge problem with all of these messages. They start you down a road of COMPARING!

I am convinced comparing is the go-to weapon of choice for the enemy. If he can open that door even a smidge, he gets you hooked. Your mind starts down a trail that is so hard to turn away from.

You try the first exit and it leads you to depression and despair because you don’t measure up. The next exit has you all holier than thou because at least you are not as bad as that person. No matter where you turn your focus remains on one thing…YOU!

Let’s get to the truth right now. You start worrying about what everyone else around you thinks. You are afraid people are not going to like you and think you aren’t good enough.

How do I know this? Because I have worn out way too many pairs of shoes on that journey. Can I tell you something I am trying to remember?

Who cares!?!?

I don’t care if I ever look like those rich, skinny women, with the perfectly organized house and thousands of followers on Pinterest. If God wanted me to be them he would have made me them. God made me the way he wanted me with my own unique qualities and talents. I need to be more aware of what he thinks of me.

You know what he thinks of you? He loves you right where you are now.

He doesn’t care if you fit into a bikini. You are perfect to him.

He doesn’t care if your home looks like the cover of a magazine. You are perfect to him.

He doesn’t care if you have organized your entire life on the most beautiful planner money can buy. You are perfect to him.

There is no need to be afraid of what everyone else thinks because the Lord is ou light and my salvation — whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of our life — of whom shall I be afraid?

Let’s not wear out another pair of shoes trying to compare our lives to someone else. Instead, let’s skip down the road of life together enjoying what we have and who we are.

Tag: Anger

Listen…

Like this:

Not a Fair Weather Friend

Like this:

Express It and Confess It!

Like this:

You Must Step into Freedom

Like this:

Sit Still in the Dark

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The Wrong Side of the Bed

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I Am Free!

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Filled With Hate, But I Must Wait

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Brick by Brick

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Who Cares?!?!

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