Galatians 5:1
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let ourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
I sat there reliving the moment over and over again. I felt the guilt and anguish. I had really screwed up! I had let my anger get the best of me and I had lashed out at my son, again!
It wasn’t the first time and I am ashamed to say it wasn’t the last either.
When my kids were growing up, I had no idea I had PTSD. I was diagnosed with depression, anxiety and even bipolar disorder, but no one had even thought of non-combat PTSD.
Non-combat. What does that even mean? It is another label they put on me to let others know that although I have PTSD, it isn’t military related. To us with PTSD, that label has no meaning. We all know the trauma we went through and how it affects each and every one of us.
Most importantly, we know the guilt we carry around because of it.
When the battle is over and the smoke clears, I see the damage I have done. I see the casualties of my sickness. I have to pick up the pieces and try to put them together again.
You don’t have to have PTSD to have these feelings. Any argument can leave you with feelings of guilt. Feelings of would of, could of and should of. It doesn’t matter who was right or who was wrong. The damage is done and no one wins.
Later, as you do pick up those pieces and the mending process starts, the guilt never seems to leave. Oh, it goes away for awhile. But then you are laying there in bed and the darkness creeps in around you. It whispers how wrong you were.
How could you have done that!
No one will ever really forgive you for that!
You are the worst person ever!
You don’t deserve to be forgiven!
You are so stupid!
These words are NOT from God!
Let me repeat that…THESE. WORDS. ARE. NOT. FROM. GOD!
Christ draws us closer to him through conviction. The Holy Spirit prompts us to make corrections in our life. Condemnation brings only darkness into our lives leaving us with more problems and no solutions.
Christ came to set us free from condemnation. He knew we were going to have “those days.” He knew we were going to face “those issues.” He also knew we wouldn’t always choose the right way to handle them. He came so we wouldn’t be held captive by our bad choices forever. We would have freedom to stand up, dust ourselves off and try again.
Our past is a chance for a teaching moment, it should not be a punishment moment. Discipline comes with love, mercy and grace. Punishment comes with hate, evil and condemnation.
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let ourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery (Galatians 5:1). Learn from your mistakes and move on. Don’t live as a slave to them for the rest of your life. Christ has opened the door of your cell, but you have to step out into the sunshine.
Copyright © 2018 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.