I Will Be Strong Tomorrow, but Not Right Now

1 Corinthians 12:9
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

I remember my brother’s funeral like it was yesterday, instead of 23 years ago.  I remember standing tall and stiff.  I remember saying over and over again, “I am an army wife.  I must be strong. I cannot cry. I have to support my mom and dad.”

It was a very difficult day for all of us.  My brother had been taken away in a very brutal way and much too young. He left a wife and two beautiful daughters behind.

No one ever wants to get a phone call saying your loved one is dead. I can’t explain how hard it is to hear the person on the other end of the phone tell you they were murdered.

For me, it was like the wind was knocked out of me and at the same time the world just stopped spinning and fell away.  I couldn’t feel my body at all.  I remember having my newborn in my arms and my friend quickly grabbing her then turning to me and setting me down on the couch.

It was in that very moment, I knew without God, I wasn’t even going to be able to take my next breath. I had no strength for anything.

At the time, I lived 12 hours away, but I don’t even remember the drive home. 

When I reached my parents house and saw my parents faces, I could only mutter a quick prayer of “God, get us through this!”

The voice I heard came back with, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

I knew from that moment on, it was not going to be easy.  I was going to be very hard.  The days to come would even seem impossible to get through at times.  However, I knew I was going to get through them.  I knew God was going to go through them for me.

Yes, you read that last statement correctly.  He was going to get through them for me and not just with me.  He had already been down that road watching a group of people murder His son. He knew the pain I was going through.

In one of my weakest hours, he was my strength. It wasn’t easy at all, but there was hope for the sun to shine again.  That is what got me through. Everything was going to be OK, just not right now. And that was OK too.

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Copyright © 2018 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

5 Replies to “I Will Be Strong Tomorrow, but Not Right Now”

  1. My brother-in-law was killed in an accident. I know that’s not as awful as murder, but I deeply relate to what you are sharing. Thank you so much for doing so. I’m so sorry, too, for the loss of your brother. I know the passing of years help, but you must continue to miss him profoundly. God’s richest blessings to you!

    Jennifer

    Like

    1. I am so sorry for your loss. Yes, the years have helped. I can say his name and laugh at the stupid things we did as kids (and even a few as adults…lol!) There are moments when I would give anything to see his smile or hear his voice one more time.
      Thank you for your kind words!
      Blessings & Hugs
      ~Tabetha

      Liked by 1 person

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