Give Me A Pen!

Romans 15:13 
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I need a pen
Give me a pen
I must write
My soul is swirling
My thoughts are jumbled

I am a complete mess
Nothing makes sense
My nerves are raw
My body is jittery
I am overwhelmed

I can’t control this feeling
The darkness haunts me
It is coming fast
I can’t stay ahead of it
How long will this last

I have the shakes
I want to pick a fight
A blood thirst some would call it
I need to calm down
I need to take a breath

I need a pen
Give me a pen
I must put my thoughts down.

~Tabetha Frick

Yesterday was a strong day for my depression.  I felt it creeping up on me.  Stalking me like a lion. I pleaded with God to take it away.  I didn’t want to walk down that path again.  I was afraid to walk down that path again.  I am always afraid I won’t find my way back.

Satan loves to play with me that way.  He loves to use my fears against me.  He loves to make the darkness swirl around me and try to strangle me. He likes to try and snuff out all my hope. My joy. My peace. He drives me to the one place he never wants to find me. Writing!

People ask me why I write.  I write because I have to.  God has placed this need inside of me.  It is my escape hatch from the darkness.  I fall on my knees and pray.  I grab a pen and just write.  Some of my darkest and yet most beautiful poetry has come out of these horrible places.

It is there in that desolate place I find joy and peace as I learn to trust in the God of hope. It is in that deserted place I begin to overflow with hope because of the power of the Holy Spirit.

I write because I need to leave a piece of me as a map for those who travel behind me.  I need to let them know they are not alone and that I pray over them constantly,

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

 

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