A Glimpse Through God’s Eyes

Psalms 18:29 (NIV)

With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall.

Last week I took my granddaughter to an indoor play area at our local mall.  Actually, we originally went there to get some yummy Chinese for lunch.  However, when she saw all the children running, jumping, climbing and screaming she looked at me with those big sparkling eyes and starting pointing and pleading, “Play MawMaw, play?!”  OK, this MawMaw’s heart melted in about 2.2 seconds and said, “Of course we will play honey.”

Now Baby-bop is petite for her age, but she is one tough little chickadee.  She is only one and a half, but she struts around like she is fully grown.  That is probably because she is around adults most of the time being an only child.

The play area was completely surrounded by a huge couch for adults to sit and relax on while their little monsters ran to and fro.  This MawMaw was still kind of leery of letting her precious little monster just go and play.  I mean there was some bigger kiddos in there.  The toys were huge and slippery.  By the way, who makes a play area where we tell you socks only and then makes all the climbing thingies slick and slippery.  I mean really??

When we first entered, Baby-bop must have been a little apprehensive as well.  She clung to my hand pretty tight and held blanky ever so closely as she sucked her thumb.  She watched the kids very carefully, cocking her head when she couldn’t quite figure out where they disappeared.  Then smiled when they came down a slide or out the other end of a tunnel.

Soon, she dropped my hand and wondered a little closer. Then she started giggling and clapping her hands as she watched several boys playing tag.  Before I knew it, blanky was left on the ground and she was screaming off into the distance.

Occasionally, she would turn and make sure I was still there.  Sometimes she would scream, “Look MawMaw” and point to something or simply want me to watch her.  A few times she came and grabbed my hand and pulled me over to make kids move out of the way or help her climb up something.

As I sat on that couch listening to her shouts of glee and occasional frustration, I saw a glimpse of us through God’s eyes.

I mean this must be what it is like for him to watch us take those first few steps into a new journey.  At first, we are frightened but we step out.  Then as we familiarize ourselves we slowly try new things, meet new people and then in a blink of His eye, we are off to the races.

Like my granddaughter, I hope you never forget help is always there.  Sometimes we just want to yell, “Look at me God, I’m doing it!”  Other times, we are racing back because we are curious or frustrated and need him to show us the way.  Yes, there are even times we come back hurt and crying.  But just like MawMaw, God will pick you up, cuddle you, dust you off and then send you back on your way.

You see even though it is nice and warm and safe cuddled in God’s arms, God knows we have to get back up and go again.  Yes, we could get hurt again, but we also get to love, learn and be filled with joy again too.  With his help we can advance against the troops; with our God, we can scale the walls!
Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.

Darkness to Light

Isaiah 41:13 (NIV)

For I am the Lord your God
who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear;
I will help you.

I promise this devotion is filled with hope and light, but to get there you must travel through my darkness.  Many years ago I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder which brings with it much panic, anxiety, depression, and mania.  As a matter of fact, in more recent years I was told I was diagnosed incorrectly and it is more likely PTSD.

Which ever label you want to give it, there are moments where the darkness attempts to engulf me.  If you suffer from any of these, I urge to reach out to someone.  Do not let go!  It is not the end!  You are not alone!

We are many and God knows each one of us by name.  He has not forgotten or forsaken us.  He is there in the midst of every second of our fight.  He is battling in places we can’t even see and doing things we can’t even imagine.

When the darkness comes and threatens to extinguish all the light around me, I often turn to writing poetry to describe what I am feeling.  The feelings seem so real at the time; I draw pictures in my mind.  The following is an example of my darkness.

The End?

I am spiraling down the hole.
I grasp and grab but nothing is there.
Air slides through my fingers
All is dark, no light at all
When will this end?

I am afraid of hitting bottom
But anything is better than this
The deep depression of unknown
The anxiety, the panic
Will this never end?

What will I find at the bottom?
What is waiting for me there?
Will I die if I reach it?
Will there be an escape?
Do I want to see the end?

I feel so alone
I feel like an idiot
I am out of control
I should have control
Please let this end!

I see how you look at me
I see the anger and disappointment
You think I am making this up
Just looking for attention
This is not what I want in the end

My heart is heavy
My head hangs low
I want to give up
I want to stop trying
I want this to be the end

So, why do I fight?
Why do I care?
Wouldn’t it be just easier to say I am done
It is finished
Now leave me to the end

Yet, I cannot
I am not finished
There is so much more to do
I must continue
I must fight until the end

How do I know God is there?  I know because in that dark cavern when I am ready to just lay down and not get up again there is a small quiet voice.  It just repeats, “I AM here, now fight!”  It starts as the dimmest of light. I can barely see if flickering far off, but it grows each time I focus and listen. It grows louder, brighter, stronger. Its name is Hope and it is hand delivered by I AM.

Isaiah 41:13 (NIV)

For I am the Lord your God
who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear;
I will help you.


Copyright © 2017 Tabetha Frick All Rights Reserved.